Saturday, August 18, 2012

#241 SCALIUS INTERRUPTUS! News Flash Nov. 2, 2012--Romney and Ryan WIN ...

 ... Support and Sympathy of Friends and Family as President Obama Is Re-Elected in Landslide Victory over Republican Ticket (AP 11/2/12). As Predicted More Than a Year Earlier by an Obscure Yet Eerily Prescient Blogger in Raleigh NC

The story begins for this Ass Press reporter (but I DO have an ASSOCIATE two-year degree) in the hospital last summer while watching what "The Blogman" called a  teevee Circus Spectacular of some kind, identified by other people as "The Republican Presidential Primaries."  I had to agree that with clown-characters like Mittens, Newt, and T-Paw--How could it be? Before this, he had long-predicted a lopsided win for Obama's re-election ... to unbelieving friends and family. They even made little circles with their forefingers around their temples, whatever that means.

On his deathbed, The Blogman (as he called himself though he hadn't been at it for a "slothful year") screamed in painful prophecy to any pretty nurse who'd listen: 

Obama landslide! ... Froggie ... Obama landslide! ... the rant trailing off with mutterings of Republicans ... crooks and liars ...  the Gremlin has plunked his Magic Twanger ... Klown Kar ... laughable ... no chance in Hell ... Obama landslide ... Ty Warner ... hahahahahaha ... the manic rantings silenced only as the narcotics took hold.

With his faithful Beanie Baby, "'Smoochy' the Frog" (***--which in delirium situ he insisted on calling Froggie the Gremlin--some medical whatnot, and caring Friends & Family, the Blogman pulled through, but was now reduced to street-corner perorations not unsimilar to those above ... cane in one hand and Smoochy/Froggie in the other, often shaking the latter in the faces of innocent passersby. Unbelievers all.

As winter came and went away, as do we all, the outbursts continued, directed at anyone who might listen ... but in no way believe. When pretend-human-being W.M.F.T. Romney (his words) confirmed himself consumptive Presidential Nominee for the revived Know-Nothing Party(his words)--the Obama-landslide rants reached ELEVEN on the Spinal Tap scale. The world standard, I take it.

Still the Unbelievers one-and-all said, "Close race," Blogman, "Close race."

Never happen ... crook, liar, tax-evader ... Obama landslide ... hahaha. Then, more lucidly, 60%-40% Obama ,,, Republicans only have the H-H factor ... 20% HATE and 20% HABIT = 40% ... Tea-Baggers and Lever-Pullers ... haha ... Watch Intrade ...

Then, in mid-August, the announcement of Rand Paul Ryan as Romney's running mate was almost too much to bear for the still-recovering Blogman. Paroxysms of jolting JOY and rattling Rapture threw him into a  diabetic coma, lasting at least several minutes on the couch   

How SWEET it is ...Obama landslide ... George's Prodigal has fucked the dog screwed the pooch for good  ... menage a' deux ... another crook and liar ... caught in the act ... Ayn Rand rampant ... Magic Twanger plunked en finale' ... Obama landslide ... 

And so it was to be, and is, a couple of months later, on this day, Nov 2nd 2012. (Ass Press)

***The Blogman claims to have been sophomore frat-boy Pledgemaster over Ty Warner's pledgedom during his freshman year in college ... which was no doubt the reason that the future Ty(coon) "Toy-Boy" Warner dropped out. [see Mosteller Musings soon about this]

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